My need for a mental health safe space resulted in me wanting to create one for others

October 25, 2023
Shanta Jethoe

In this article, the following topic is mentioned: eating disorders.

A story may not completely make sense unless you tell the full story.
While working on phase[0] and subshape, I have been frequently asked ‘why’ questions. Amongst colleagues and friends there were those who wondered how a visual artist came to be working on something that seemingly had little to do with, well, you know, visual arts. Although for me it seemed like a logical step, I came to understand that my own hesitation to share about my life meant that an important fragment of the story was missing for others. As long as I was withholding a piece of my personal history, people could not completely understand the why.

Long before this enterprise took its shape, I thought of the concept of a mental health safe space. It was during a time of distress. I was in the middle of eating disorder recovery, battling thoughts and feelings that overwhelmed me.

During my recovery, I sometimes noticed that my healthcare didn’t always match my needs and wants. I realised that healthcare professionals could only help me to a certain extent (understandably so). Oftentimes, I’d feel really lonely.

I wanted to create connections with other people my age, with similar backgrounds and shared life experiences. I wished there was a place where I wouldn’t feel the weight of my own and others’ constant judgement, a place that came with a support system of people whom I could share my story with and where I could perhaps be inspired by others. Surely, there were others who wanted to feel connected as well.

The need for connection with other people left me with a sense of motivation: I had decided that perhaps I could create this something, I had missed.

For years, I have thought about this space on and off, what it would be like, look like, and most importantly what it would feel like. Sometimes I would sketch or write about such a place. Then for months I would leave it be, because I wasn’t mentally in the right place to think about it.

After my extensive therapies, I felt like I was ready to continue this story. I experienced passion and joy again. I found beauty in the things I feared the most, namely food, selfcare, clothes and art. I was able to change my destination from a dead end towards a path of hope and future. It was then that I was determined to create this safe space to just be.

Many months later, the concept of phase[0] emerged. subshape followed.

To others, phase[0] and subshape may feel abstract at times. To me, it is a piece of me that wants to give back.

I have been told that phase[0] is me in art installation form. This may be true. I went from having an eating disorder to finding joy in food and working with it, from becoming an artist to learning that creativity gives life positivity and helps you connect to yourself and others.

Life can be rough. Life can be great.

And then there is everything in between. phase[0] and subshape come from a place of sorrow, sadness, grief, loneliness. More importantly, they come from a place of hope, perseverance, love and creativity. Seemingly small moments can have a long lasting impact on others. With phase[0] and subshape I hope to create small moments of joy for others.

At phase[0], I want to make room for whatever it is that is happening in your lives.

Food and arts are vehicles to establish connections and to inspire and create.

At the centre of subshape are stories. This is your platform to explore and to connect by sharing your stories, whether fully, partially or in any way that suits your needs.

Illustrations by Ruben Gringhuis (@gringocomics)